Draco's Biggest Fear
by BeasWonderwall
Summary: Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger obviously hate each other when others are around but what happened in the train cabin on their first ride to Hogwarts? And how do they really feel about each other?


**Draco's biggest fear.**

Draco Malfoy. How should I try to explain what Draco Malfoy is like?

He's pretty tall; nearly 6 feet. His hair has the colour of the bright full moon; it's nearly white with a little blonde in it. They way little kids imagine the hair of an angel. His greyish eyes are the most remarkable thing about him. They can burn you and they can make you drown in their depths. He has outstanding features and always wears a black suit whenever you'll meet him outside of school. Normally he's staring onto his feet all the time but whenever he looks up there's a small sparkle in his eyes, just a little hint, as if he had been dreaming of a better place to be.

Draco Malfoy. How should I try to explain what I think about Draco Malfoy?

He's a dreamer – and an asshole most of the time but mostly a dreamer. We met on the Hogwarts train in our very first year at the school for witchcraft and wizardry and he didn't know what I was. Maybe that has been the reason why he had been nice to me at the beginning. It quickly turned as he found out what blood ran through my veins. Muggle blood, the liquid dead of our friendship. But the one thing I had learnt about Draco Malfoy during our short friendship was that he could be trusted. He would never tell your secrets if he didn't want to. And that he was weak. He was probably the weakest guy I had ever seen in my life.

Draco Malfoy. How should I try to explain what I feel for Draco Malfoy?

He's my friend. He still is though we're not talking to each other anymore. He still is though my best friends are hating on him. He still is though he insults me whenever he gets the opportunity to. Maybe I should hate him but I can't because every time he looks at me there's this little sparkle before he insults me and every time he turns away from me I see him hesitating. Maybe this is all just bull shit but I would still want to be friends with him. Always was, always am, always will.

Hermione Granger. How should I try to explain what Hermione Granger is like?

She's a girl, obviously. She's not that tall, normal I would say. She has bushy hair and though she does her best to tame it every now and then she would look like back in the days when I first met her. Her eyes have the colour of amber and they always start glowing whenever she's seeing a book or something else she could read. As soon as she starts reading her lips begin to move gently against each other and you can hear her murmur the words lowly. She doesn't care much about her outer appearance. I just saw her in a dress once, at the Yule Ball and I have to admit that she didn't look that bad.

Hermione Granger. How should I try to explain what I think about Hermione Granger?

She is a Gryffindor. She's brave and loyal towards her friends and even if I don't like them I have to admit that they can be happy about what they have got. Sometimes (just sometimes) I wish I could switch life with one of them just to be closer to her. The first time I met her was on the train to Hogwarts in our very first year. She sat in the same cabin with me and we started talking. I probably never talked that much before with a girl. Everything was fine until she told me that her parents were dentists. It was pretty obvious then that she was a muggleborn. And that's it. This day had been the beginning and the end of a friendship.

Hermione Granger. How should I try to explain what I feel for Hermione Granger?

She may be a mudblood but she's still the girl I talked to for nearly three hours. Maybe this is one of those experiences that will change you forever. If my father would find out that my biggest wish is to go back to that 1st September he would probably kill me but seriously I wouldn't care as long as I could spend those 3 hours with her once more. Maybe this is naïve and stupid and reckless. So, let's face it, me and Granger will never be friends. Never were, never are, never will.

Hermione sat down on the big stone right beside the black lake on the foot of the hill Hogwarts stood on. She always sat down here whenever something would bother her so much that she wasn't able to talk with Harry and Ron about it. This was the place she first met Victor Krum as the nice gentleman he was outside the whole famous-quidditchplayer-stuff.

The wind blew her curls around her face and she put them back into a loosely bun so she could read the thin leather book she brought with her. Gently she touched the spine of the book in her hands. The golden letters shimmered in the bright sun just like the leaves around her that fell down the huge oak right behind her.

Hermione let her eyes wandered over the area surrounding her. The lake lay peacefully in front of her without throwing any waves until a gentle breeze would stroke its surface and propel the small waves towards the waterside. To her right side she could see the steam of Hagrid's hut. He probably was making this awful tea her and Harry had to drink the last time they had visited him. She could hear the barking sound of Fang as he probably had spotted a mouse sitting under the rotten stairs towards the wooden door.

Though Hermione enjoyed the silence around her she missed the company of her best friends. She took out her wand and murmured "Expecto Patronum". The little otter popped out of her wand and frolic around her, glowing silvery and lighting up her mood. She watched it while it flew over the water.

Draco stopped as he saw the small frame sitting by the water, joined by a shimmering figure above her right shoulder. He knew those bushy curls and the lovely face they belonged to just too well. Leaning against the tree trunk of the big oak which branches covered the stone Granger was sitting on, he watched her for a while before he stepped out into the light.

"Granger …" He said gently, trying not to scare her. He was pretty sure that no one was around. It was way too could to stay outside though the sun shined brighter than the two weeks before. "Where are Potter and Weasley?"

Hermione looked up at the boy standing in front of her. She could catch the small sparkle in his grey eyes right before it disappeared like always. "What do you want, Malfoy?" She asked him and concentrated on the book again. She was expecting an insult or something like this. He always had done it the past few years even when they had been alone like this.

Draco could sense the hurt in her voice and shivered. He didn't want her to hate him. He wanted her to be with him. As a friend, of course. "Nothing …" He murmured and looked at the patronus which kept staring at him with those two dark orbs. "Can I sit down?"

Hermione looked up startled but placed her bag beside her feet so that Draco could sit next to her. The otter flew through the air and faded away slowly after Draco had sat down. Hermione sighed and started reading again. The book was about the founder of Gryffindor and Hermione couldn't help but look up every now and then, checking if Draco was staring at her. He never was. He kept looking at the lake and sighed once in a while.

Draco couldn't help but look to his right every now and then, checking if Hermione would look up from her book and make an attempt to talk to him, but she never would. He sighed whenever that happened and tried to push the awkwardness of this scene aside.

After Hermione had read another chapter she finally closed her book and took her wand once more. "Expecto Patronum." She whispered again, knowing that there never would be a conversation with Draco again. Too much had happened since their first and last chat. Correction, too much bad had happened since their first and last chat. Hermione would never be able to forget all the names he had called her. The small otter lay down at her feet, making the ends of her shoes reflecting his shimmering figure.

Draco stared at the patronus and without thinking he whispered "I'd love to be able to make one."

Hermione looked up and she had to smile as she saw that Draco's cheek turn a shade of pink under her glare. "What did you say?"

"Nothing." Draco said hastily and looked at his intertwined fingers. The otter titled his head to one side and Draco had to bit back a smile. He always had been full of envy whenever he had seen Potter producing a patronus. This had been one of the rare charms his father never thought about teaching him. A charm against fear, a Malfoy never even showed fear. But Draco would've loved a little company of a shimmering animal every now and then though he was afraid that his patronus would be something like a snake or a rat. He had been like those animals a thousand times before.

"You said something." Hermione stated and put the book into her bag, closing it. She stood up and the patronus disappeared again. "Well, if that's the case then goodbye, Malfoy. We'll see each other around."

"Don't go." Draco ordered and Hermione turned around fully surprised by his tone. He wanted to take it back immediately but he knew that he couldn't. It would show weakness and if there was one person he couldn't show weakness to then it was Hermione, the girl he was afraid being friends with.

"Are you ordering me?" She asked and her voice sounded furiously.

"No …" Draco murmured, knowing that he was lying. He ordered her but just because he was used to insulting and treating her in a wrong way. "I'm begging you." There he was, standing in front of the girl he was afraid of, telling her that he begged her to stay.

"You are begging me?" Hermione's eyebrows disappeared behind her curls as she made three steps into Draco's direction. "You are begging me?"

"I'm asking you to teach me how to produce a patronus." Draco said looking at his feet, embarrassed by his loss of self control. "Please." He added as Hermione hadn't answered him yet.

"Why should I do this? Why should I teach you after you've been insulting me for five years? Why should I teach you after hating on my best friends?" Hermione made him look at her with her words and she could read the guilt in them. He felt guilty for what he did and this insight made her last question come a lot softer. "Why should I teach you after ignoring the friendship we had?"

"I didn't ignore it." Draco stated. "I just … hid it."

Hermione started laughing hysterically. "Listen, Draco. I'll teach you how to produce a patronus if you'll stop avoiding me."

Draco hesitated. How much he wanted to take the hand she offered him but what would his parents say? And Blaze and Pansy? They would laugh at him for being friends with Gryffindor, even worse a muggleborn and worst of all the best friend of Harry Potter. "Fine." He said after discussing it with himself. As he took Hermione's hand electric jolts ran up and down his spine and he enjoyed this new feeling inside his body.

"Good, let's start." She let go of his hand and turned around walking a few feet away from him. "Take your wand and think about a happy memory."

Draco stared at her, his wand in his right hand.

As she turned around and he still stared at her, Hermione got a little bit nervous. "What is it, Draco?" she asked him worried, blushing under his glare.

"I can't." He said and looked away from her brimming orbs. Suddenly there was another need inside of him and he had to do his best to push it away as quick as possible. He shouldn't have those thoughts about Hermione. It was worse enough that he agreed with not avoiding her anymore. He couldn't start to fall in love with her.

"Why not?" Hermione walked up to him and gently touched his arm. She looked at the Slytherin in front of her and the joy inside her body wanted to explode. He agreed on being friends with her.

"Because … I don't have one." Draco looked up and stared into those golden eyes again. He shouldn't have been avoiding her for years. He always had caught a glimpse at her from the distance, watching her growing up. Admiring her at the Yule Ball, nearly as jealous as Weasley as Krum had kissed her on the hand … TWICE! He would've taken their first chat but it wasn't a happy one at all. It probably was the saddest one ever because the chat ended with those words.

"_So what are your parents doing for living?" Draco had asked and looked at the girl._

"_They're dentists." Hermione beamed, lucky to talk about her life. "They're the best in my hometown."_

"_What is a dentist? I've never heard about this? Are they doing something with magic?" Draco had asked curiously, eager to learn something new about that girl he had such a warm feeling with._

"_No they're not." Hermione said. "They're fixing people's teeth."_

"_Why?" Draco was amazed by her answer._

"_Cause muggles can't use magic to fix them." Slowly Hermione got nerved with his questions. It wasn't that hard to get, was it?_

"_Your parents are muggles?" The question came slowly and Draco's voice was so low that Hermione had to hear closely to understand him._

"_Yes."_

"_Then get out of my life."_

This had probably been the worst mistake of his entire life. How could he be that stupid by sending her away?

Hermione sighed and her hot breath crashed onto his neck making shivers went up and down his spine. "Well, that's a problem. I'm sorry for you, Draco." She added in a whisper and slung her arms around his waist, snuggling her face into his coat.

"It's not your fault." He said and embraced her, enjoying the warmth of her body. Her hair tickled his chin but he never had been happier then in this moment with the girl he had always wanted to be with since her first met her. "Well, not entirely." He added with a smirk on his face.

"What do you mean 'not entirely'?" Hermione asked suspiciously and freed herself, locking eyes with him.

He brushed a strand of hair behind her ear and chuckled. "Well, you kept on haunting me after that talk we had in the train. I couldn't forget that we were friends and every time I said something bad to you it made me sad to see you being hurt by my words. Cause all I really wanted was to make you smile and not to bring you to tears. I wanted to be there for you instead of Weasley and Potter but I couldn't and that's your fault. Why did you have to choose my cabin and make my life miserable the first time I met you? Why did you have to become a Gryffindor instead of Hufflepuff or Ravenclaw? Why did you have to choose Potter and Weasley for your best friends instead of me?"

Hermione's eyes glittered suspiciously. "Well, because you decided to throw me out of your cabin back in the days. You never even tried to become friends with me, Draco. All you did was making me cry and having bad dreams about you. I really want to be friends with you, Draco."

Draco smiled and extended his hand. "Friends?"

"Friends." Hermione said and took his hand, pulling him into another hug.

Draco smiled and hid his face at her shoulder, taking in the light strawberry smell of her hair. He took his wand and whispered "Expecto Patronum" letting a dog break out his wand. A golden retriever barked loudly and made them back away from each other.

"You did it!" Hermione shrieked and gave him a peck onto his cheek before she admired the patronus. "It's beautiful."

"It's dog." Draco stated. Happy inside that it wasn't something worse like a snake or a rat. "Why is it a dog?"

"Because dogs are loyal and they're always there for their friends. And dogs who bark don't bite." Hermione added chuckling.

Draco put his arm around Hermione and she leaned against him while they watched the patronus slowly disappearing again as t frolicked around the waterside. "Thank you." Draco said.

"You're welcome." Hermione answered with a smile on her lips. She slung her arms around Draco's waist once more and together they looked at the lake, enjoying the silence around them. But mostly enjoying the company of each other.


End file.
